Chaos Coordinator

Confession. I have a hard time saying no to things. I'm known to have a foot in everything, especially when it comes to our kiddos. "Having boundaries" isn't exactly my strong point. In my defense, all the things I say "yes" to bring me some amount of joy, so I don't think it's fair to complain about the scheduling chaos it can cause. If you ask my family, I was practically born saying, "what are we doing next?" I love a busy schedule, a color-coordinated planner, and just go-go-going. But lately, I've been thinking, when is it too much?

We've all had to slow down at some point in the last two years due to COVID. Whether it was because of quarantine, working from home, mandated shutdowns, or the sheer health and safety of our family, each has left us homebound several times since 2020. At the time, that home-time felt like a necessary change of pace. Looking back, we were eating more family meals, spending more time outside, moving our bodies together, and driving each other crazy on occasion.

Slowly our empty calendar started filling again, and the return of activities and meetings felt fresh. After getting a taste of a more balanced schedule, I notice I get overwhelmed easier now. I'm not sure that's entirely a bad thing either. Maybe it's my subconscious reminding me to pump the planning breaks. Sometimes I listen, but many times I don't - and I  power through like I've done for the last 30+ years.

Eventually, the chaos catches up to all of us. I see myself being less patient with less positive energy. The kids are moody and sluggish. We find ourselves feeling the need for a weekend, from our weekends - or extra time during the week to just, I don't know - sit.

We're entering a busy time of year for our family between hockey, dance, Mitch and I's work, PTO events, our own hobbies, and a social life sprinkled in when possible. Again, all things that bring my heart an enormous amount of pleasure, but I recognize now more than ever the importance of balance.

Wednesdays are free nights at our house. It's a night of no extracurricular activities, and Mitch and I do our best to keep the night free of work commitments or organization meetings. Usually, my mind says, "It's a free night! Let's go do something fun as a family!" But tonight, we just stayed home. We made dinner, talked about our day, and I forced the kids to watch Encanto with me so I could sing along to all the songs. The night was simple. Something out of the ordinary for me, but I weirdly feel more easygoing about a night at home. Tonight was a mid-week reset, and we needed it because the rest of the week and weekend are busy.

I will likely continue to be the Executive Chaos Coordinator in this house. I like being active, being a part of a group, and planning things. To my core, it's just who I am. The difference now is I understand the importance of rest and balance. How saying "not tonight" or "no" is okay. A little chaos is fine, but a night at home singing "We don't talk about Bruno" at the top of my lungs is important too.